


let me cater to you

by melodypond_thewomanwhomarriedme



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Darillium, During their 24 years, F/M, Happy anniversary to the saps whose love legit ruined my life, Plot What Plot, Pointless fluff, Post-Episode: 2015 Xmas The Husbands of River Song, nothing i answer, there is no point, what is the point of this fic you ask
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-22
Updated: 2018-04-22
Packaged: 2019-04-26 07:35:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14397315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melodypond_thewomanwhomarriedme/pseuds/melodypond_thewomanwhomarriedme
Summary: “You’re so easy, my love.”“I’m not easy, River.”She arched an eyebrow. “Last week I accidentally burnt the take-out while reheating it for breakfast and you immediately - /immediately/ - ran out to buy some more just because I said I was craving for it.”He frowned. “Well, what was I supposed to do?”





	let me cater to you

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RegalPotato](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RegalPotato/gifts).



> YAY I WROTE SOMETHING!!!! This was supposed to be a yowzahversary fic for my favourite couple of all time and space, but I honestly just realised that it’s coincidentally Katie’s birthday (i mean, technically it was yesterday, but you know. Pretty close!) so HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY KATIE I WROTE YOU FLUFF (i’m sorry i know you’re the Angst Queen but I couldn’t bring myself to write angst on their anniversary)! I hope you like it and that it makes sense because honestly I... don’t even know what this is. Legit. I blacked out.

He made his way through the university halls as quietly as possible. Lessons were still going on, after all, and it wouldn’t do to get kicked out before he could carry out his little plan. After that, he didn’t care if they told him he could never come within ten kilometres of this place.

The university was unnecessarily sizable for such a small colony, he thought in annoyance as he passed yet another empty lecture hall. He’d been sneaking around the corridors for a good half hour, and if he didn’t find River’s bloody classroom soon, he wouldn’t be able to slip into her class before it ended.

For the last two years, they’d been living in the sort of matrimonial bliss they never allowed themselves to experience before, too afraid of the implications of staying together too long. Too afraid that, if they tried sporadic bouts of domesticity they wouldn’t ever be able to leave each other - which, given their tangled timelines, would surely be a problem.

But now, with the promise of twenty-four years, the pull of having adventures and the thrill of running into danger had faded. To their surprise (and utter delight), both of them enjoyed doing nothing all day, every day - just laying in bed and whispering soft admissions of love to each other. The Doctor had had a millenium of pent-up love that he’d surpressed in her absence, and now that he had her, for longer than he’d even thought was possible, there was absolutely no chance of him not conveying how much she meant to him.

He had thought they were both content with this lifestyle until she told him, out of the blue one day while he was preparing breakfast, that she was going back to teaching. 

“What? Why?” He spun around immediately, abandoning the pancake mix he’d been working on. 

“I feel... I don’t know, restless, I guess.” She shrugged. “Teaching makes me happy and I don’t - ”

”Are you saying that you’re not - that the past two years you’ve been - ”

Realising what she said and how she said it, registering the way his eyes widened in horror and the way his voice was laced with such uncertainty and an undertone of sadness, she shook her head frantically, reaching up a hand to cup his face in comfort.

” _God,_ no, darling.” She whispered, stroking his cheek and managing a warm smile. “You’ve been terrific, honey, truly. You make me so happy.”

”Good.” He whispered back. It was all he could manage because the thought of that River wasn’t satisfied or happy with the way things were filled him with so much dread he couldn’t handle anything else. If she felt like she was being forced into spending twenty-four years with him then he’d rather not have it at all. 

He circled his arms around her waist, pulling her closer. It was all he could do to remind himself that she was happy with him.

”You have things to do,” she explained, willingly entering his embrace and tucking her head under his chin. “You’ve got projects and works and - well, me.” She pulled her hand away from his face to pull him closer, holding him tightly to her. “I don’t have anything else to do in this house. If I don’t find something I feel like I’ll start going crazy and reorganise the Tardis.”

He stayed quiet for a while, contemplating. If she worked, even part-time, it would mean hours and hours lost when they could be spending time together. It wasn’t ideal. On the other hand, her working would mean he’d have more time to work on said ‘project’. Which was saving River from the Library. 

“You can - I don’t know, find other ways to make me happy?” he suggested, rubbing his hands over her back.

”Don’t I already?” she asked, pulling back to meet his eyes.

There wasn’t the same uncertainty in her voice as there was in his earlier - perhaps because he never failed to tell her what this little period of time mean to him, or perhaps because, despite having her, he had never felt so undeserving of her love. 

Unable to help himself, his eyes softened immediately as he looked down at her, lips curling into a grin. 

“Always.” he said, pressing a kiss onto her lips.

“You’re so easy, my love.”

”I’m not easy, River.”

She arched an eyebrow. “Last week I accidentally burnt the take-out while reheating it for breakfast and you immediately -  _immediately_ \- ran out to buy some more just because I said I was craving for it.”

He frowned. “Well, what was I supposed to do? You were upset and guilty about burning breakfast and I just wanted to make you feel better.”

She smiled, raising both eyebrows pointedly. “Sap.”

”Okay, fine, I’m easy.” he huffed, wondering when was the exact moment, in the last two years, that he turned from being all gruff eyebrows into a moony-eyed sap. Must be River. “But only because it’s you.”

Definitely River.

”Darling, I love that I make you happy. And you make me _so_ happy, honey, really, you do.” she insisted, smiling fondly at him for a moment before she sighed, “But it feels like - like I have no purpose around here.”

She looked so unhappy and lost that he just - 

“How long have you felt like this, River? Because we said no more secrets unless it’s spoilers and you sound so - ”

”Only recently, Doctor, I promise.” she buries her nose in his neck, her curls tickling his cheek. “You’ve been so wonderful and amazing and you know how happy you make me. I wish it was enough but I’m sorry, sweetie, I need something else to do with all this time.”

He should’ve known River would never be content in staying still - not _just_ this way, at least. Even the most secure prison in the entire universe couldn’t contain her, and there was no way she’d change that just because he was willing to play house now. 

What he _did_ know, was that River would do whatever she wanted, regardless of whether he agreed or not. She wasn’t asking him for permission to go back to teaching - she was _telling_ him, because that was the kind of relationship they had with each other now. No more hiding. 

His answer would either start an argument or make her smile and he knew which one he’d prefer. Arguing about this would be a waste of precious time that was already slipping through their fingers with each passing day.

”Not everyday.” he said.

“No.” she agreed. “Four times a week, max.”

 _“Four?”_  he repeated in disbelief. He shook his head. “No, no, no, River, that’s - that’s too long, too many hours without you - ”

”Well, how many hours will I be able to work before you start missing me?”

”Point three seconds.”

” _Doctor._ ”

”Alright, alright.” he conceded, though he could tell by the flush in her cheeks that she enjoyed all his sap. He couldn’t resist planting a kiss to her forehead. “How about two days? Three days max, _only_ if there aren’t any other teachers available to teach those little critters.”

”Two days a week, three days max.” she agreed, and he resisted the urge to sigh in relief. He thought that it’d be a little more difficult to convince her that two days was enough work for her. 

“Doctor,” she said after a while, her voice serious and her tone unsure. “You know this isn’t because I’m unhappy with you, right? I mean,” she flicked her eyes over his and tried to sound her most sincere. “I love you so much, and I don’t want to spend a lot of time without you, but I just - ”

“I know, sweetheart, I love you too. If this is what makes you happy then I can’t say anything, can I? I want you to be happy too. Besides,” he smiled cheekily. “I’m sure I’ll be able to survive being without you for a few hours two days a week.”

He couldn’t.

The morning of her first day at work arrived incredibly quickly, and he didn’t realise how much he’d miss her until faced with the prospect of spending the next twelve hours without her. She delighted in the fact that he was nothing but supportive even though she knew he was reluctant to let her out of his sight. However, he figured that River of all people deserved to be happy, and he was adamant on not ruining this for her. 

So after giving her a thorough snog against the front door and muttering into her ear about how much he’ll miss her, he let her go off to work. 

The minute the door closed behind him he started moping. He cleaned up the dirty dishes left from their breakfast and cleared the house a little, knowing River would appreciate his efforts. Then he started working on his project. 

Trying to find a way to help his wife escape the database was proving to be the most difficult challenge he’d ever been faced with - which was fitting, given that it was the most crucial. He would need to find a body that could hold her memories, knowledge and telepathic abilities as well as remain strong enough to be put through regeneration. Once he was done with that, he’d have to go back to Gallifrey and demand them to give her her regenerations back since they were wasted on him. There was just the little issue of _where_  to find the body.

Working on this was hard to do when River was around but without her it was almost impossible. At least while she was here he had constant reassurance of her presence - she was asleep, but she was warm and soft and _breathing -_ but now that she wasn’t he couldn’t keep his heart from beating wildly in his chest as he looked around the Tardis library at all the books. In his mind’s eye, he imagined a chair with wires and cables and a countdown and River, all around, her voice and her words echoing in his head and causing a pounding headache.

_“You took me to Darillium.”_

_”The towers sang, and you cried.”_

_”What a night that was.”_

_”Not one line. Don’t you dare.”_

_”Hush, sweetie.”_

He rushed down to the console but the Tardis had sensed his distress and was already dialling even before he reached the bottom stair. He licked his lips and swallowed in relief when River picked up the call, sounding amused and slightly annoyed. 

“Doctor, the house better be on fire or something because class starts in two minutes and I do _not_ have time for this.”

”What time is your lunch break?” He asked, thanking heavens that he didn’t sound choked or hoarse even though it felt as though hearing her voice had made him breathe air into his lungs for the first time. 

“My lunch break?” She repeated, sounding genuinely surprised. “Half past one. Why?”

”Great! See you then. Good luck, love you!”

”Wait, Doctor, you don’t have to - ”

The Tardis hung up the phone before she could finish and he grinned, stroking the console fondly. “Thank you, Old Girl.”

He turned his back on the research, heading towards the door. He had a lunch to prepare.

*

Lunch was River’s favourite type of ravioli - beef with ricotta cheese - and his homemade tomato marinara sauce. It took a while to get the dough right, and by the time he completed everything he found that he only had half an hour left. Knowing that it wasn’t remotely enough time to get changed, pack and get to the university, he sulked to the Tardis, feeling disappointed and missing his wife dearly. 

“Er - sorry honey,” he apologised when she picked up the phone. “I won’t make it in time to have lunch with you today.”

”Oh, Doctor,” she sighed, though he could tell she was more amused than annoyed. “It’s fine, really, I wouldn’t be able to anyway - the Head of Department’s going to introduce me to the rest of the staff. He wanted to have lunch together.”

”He?” He asked, but she ignored him.

”Listen, darling, I’ve got to get back now but I’ll see you at home for dinner, alright?”

She stayed silent for a while and he realised it was because she was waiting for an answer. 

“Yes.” He replied hastily. “I’ll see you for dinner at - oh...”

”Oh what?”

”Nothing, dear.” He smiled as an idea occured to him.

”Mmmhmmm.” She said disbelievingly, and he knew that if he could see her now her eyes would be narrowed suspiciously. She didn’t push the subject, though he could tell that she wanted to. “Don’t do anything that might make me cross, Doctor.” She warned.

”I promise I won’t do anything that’ll make you cross.”

”Good.” He could hear her hesitation through the phone. Then, evidently deciding that his promise was enough, she said, “I’ll see you later, honey. Love you.”

”Love you.” He grinned as he hung up the phone.

Right. Dinner, then.

Since the main course was already prepared, he thought about preparing dessert just to wash it down. River really liked those mini strawberry cheesecake that he made, but he quickly decided against it. Cheesecake paired with beef and ricotta cheese ravioli seemed a bit much. 

Finally settling on a simple hazelnut chocolate cake, he bustled about the kitchen in search of ingredients, making a list of what he didn’t have and heading to the Tardis’ kitchens. He found that the Old Girl was heavily stocked with every ingredient he needed and thanked her, feeling her pleasant hum in reply. 

He had seven hours until River ended work and the university was a half hour away by foot, which meant that he had six hours to prepare the cake, pack, change and leave. Easy peasy.

The Doctor was no culinary expert, but he wasn’t a beginner either. Living with River meant that he had been the one to learn his way around the kitchen. Not that he was complaining - he loved cooking for River and she loved watching him work in the kitchen. It was like a weird aphrodisiac for her, watching him so comfortable around the kitchen. Maybe it was because his previous regeneration couldn’t be trusted to hold a frying pan without dropping it on his foot. The first time she watched him cook she managed to distract him four times, and by then the kitchen was smoking. He banned her from the kitchen after that, but that lasted about two minutes. Since then she promised to keep her hands to herself before the meal was cooked. 

Two years of cooking for River, planning romantic meals and setting it up to surprise her within a time frame meant that six hours was plenty of time to bake a hazelnut chocolate cake. Within an hour and a half, the cake was sitting in the fridge, cooling so that he could pack it later. 

Four and a half hours. He could wait for that long.

*

A simple dinner with ravioli and hazelnut chocolate cake turned into a five-course meal before he could blink. Three hours later, he sat at the dining table, looking around at everything he’d prepared. Every course was River’s favourite appetiser, soup or salad. The Doctor had no idea if the dishes ‘complimented’ each other (whatever that meant), but River definitely liked them, and that was good enough for him.

After showering and packing everything he needed(plus a few extra things just in case), there was only an hour left before River ended. Smiling proudly at his reflection and thinking about the look on River’s face when she saw everything he’d prepared, he grabbed the heavy bag off the countertop and headed towards the direction of the university.

The walk was long and tiring, and by the time he actually reached the university his patience was wearing thin. Flashing his psychic paper irately at the security guard without stopping, he set off to the main building in search of River’s classes. When he came across a map of the campus, his eyes automatically scanned for the archaeology building - which was, of course, at the other end of the university.

Sighing wearily, he thought about reaching early enough to watch River teaching and immediately he perked up, lengthening his stride. He found the archaeology building in under fifteen minutes, all the while thinking about River, reading glasses on and commanding the lecture hall with her easy confidence and charming smile.

Lecture halls took up two floors of the building and the Doctor sped up, eager to finally see River in action. The floorplan was confusing - he opened multiple doors to the same classroom and some doors were hidden behind curtains like some goddamn magic show. Tired, impatient and missing River after spending more time without her than he’d had in the last two years, he hurriedly went through each door, hoping to see the golden curls he loved so much.

It was the seventh door on the second floor. He opened it quietly when he heard voices through the wood sticking his head inside. Raising his eyebrows at the size of the lecture hall - River had gotten one of the bigger ones - his eyes took in the scene.

Up on the screen, there was a picture of an artifact on display. He couldn’t bring up any interest to actually read a word on the screen, so he opened the door fully and slid in the room, hopefully unnoticed. The entire lecture hall was filled but the last row, which was honestly quite shocking - were they _all_ interested in archaeology? Pity.

Around him, students were engaged in enthusiastic discussion about the Philosopher’s Stone and he huffed, muttering under his breath and correcting their statements. Finally managing to tune out on the completely inaccurate opinion of the student seated a row below him, he scanned the room carefully, looking for a mane of wild curls.

Ah, there!

She was nodding and listening intently to the students huddled around her in the far corner of the room. Her reading glasses were perched on top of her curls, which were piled into a messy bun atop of her head. From that angle, he could only make out her head and shoulders. He stood up, forgetting where he was for a moment as set the bag aside, intending to call out her name. Then he saw her and his mouth went dry and his voice got stuck in his throat. 

That was _not_ what she was wearing when she left.

She’d donned a simple, black, _decent-lengthed_ dress when he had seen her off that morning, but now it was replaced by an ensemble that made his eyes darken the longer he stared at her - a white button up shirt with a neatly folded collar tucked into a black skirt that was he swore was at least one size too tight - and to make it worse, she’d left the top two buttons of her shirt unbuttoned, giving everyone an amazing eyeful.

Swallowing back a hoarse curse, he simply stared at her for a few moments before sitting back in his seat. He tried vainly to tone down his arousal by tuning into the nearest students’ talk, assuming it was about archaeology.

”I mean, she’s _amazingly_  hot, man.” Sighed a girl with brown hair. It took a moment for the Doctor to register that she was talking about River - his _wife_  - and he turned his glare onto her, narrowing his eyes threateningly as he tried to catch the rest of their conversation. 

“Do you think she’s married?” Asked another girl, blatantly looking at River with a hungry stare.

 _Yes she is_ , he thought, annoyed. He folded his arms and continued glaring at the pair of them. Fucking critters.

”Good question, Katie.” The first girl said, craning her neck without getting up from her seat. “I dunno - can’t see a wedding ring though.”

 _Fixing that immediately_ , he thought to himself. His glare intensified, willing them to burst into flames and dissolve into a pile of ash. 

“Do you think she swings this way?”

”Can’t tell. But if she does, don’t think you’ll be getting first dibs, Vo. She ain’t blind.”

The Doctor watched, torn between amusement and possessiveness over River, as the two girls started arguing. He left them to themselves, scanning the room for River again - she had since moved on from the first group of students and was now interacting with a boy. The rest of the students were torn between their work and staring at their professor. The Doctor gritted his teeth and rolled his eyes. Couldn’t they at least _try_ to make their attraction less obvious? Fucking critters, stealing his wife from him and still having the gall to look at her like a piece of meat. 

She circled the room slowly, talking to students and answering questions, but mostly she watched them work together. She kept an eye out for any raised hands while she attended to different students and when faced with difficult questions she gave them a smirk and answered confidently. She looked so at ease there, in front of the lecture hall on stage, that he wondered why she never approached him sooner. Knowing River, it was probably because she was afraid about how he’d react. 

He sighed, staring at his wife with a fond smile. What a lucky man he was.

He stayed in his seat, watching his wife in her element, which by far was much more arousing than anything she wore (which was really saying something). There was just something remarkably _sexy_ in the way she expertly answered her students’ questions, especially those who took one look at her and decided that they were better. She always wore a confident smirk on her lips, but in this setting, when she was doing something she so obviously loved, the Doctor felt just the tiniest bit aroused.

Just as he was wondering when the hell the bloody class was going to end, the bell rang immediately, River spoke over the sounds of chairs scraping the floor and students chatting merrily.

”Right. This week’s assignment is a detailed account of the origins and makings of the Philosopher’s Stone. Due next week, no exceptions.”

He sat patiently in his seat by the door, as one by one students filed out of the room. He made sure to glare at everyone he’d seen staring at River inappropriately, and ignored the strange looks some of them gave him. When the hall cleared, he stood up, pleased to finally be alone with his wife - until he saw her still talking to a student - this one with a short blonde bob, wearing rainbow braces that his previous regeneration would definitely fawn over. He walked down the steps quietly, the bag of food in hand.

”I’m _really_ sorry about staining your dress, Ri - uh, Professor.” She flushed at her mistake but River just smiled kindly and patted her arm. The student stared at River’s hand on her arm, looking as if she couldn’t believe her teacher was touching her.

”It’s alright, Jane. It’s not the first time someone’s spilt a drink on me.”

For some reason, the student turned even redder at that. 

“Uh, yeah.” She said awkwardly, spinning around fast. “I’ll see you next week, Riv - um, sorry, I mean - Professor.”

Before River could even smile at her, she bolted toward the door, caught sight of the Doctor still hovering on the steps and let out a terrified squeak. Managing to pass it up as a hiccup, she raced past him and out the door.

”Couldn’t wait for me at home?”

River’s voice immediately distracted him from thoughts about the strange blonde student, an he turned to face her again, a smile on his face. She was leaning against a heavy oak table in the middle of the stage, smiling coyly and crossing one leg over the other as he approached.

”Thought I’d surprise my wife on her first day of work,” he said. “And tell her what a wonderful teacher she is.”

”Flatterer.”

He finally reached the table, setting the bag of food on the wood and snagging her waist immediately.

”Missed you.” And without giving her a chance to reply, he bent down to give her a soft kiss.

Their lips part after a few moments but he didn’t move away, letting her snuggle up against him. She hopped up onto the table, making herself comfortable as her hands found their way to his cheeks, stroking softly. 

“Maybe you should get a haircut.” She muttered, her eyes trailing over the silver hair that stuck up in odd directions. Her fingers moved through his soft hair, gently combing it. 

“Do you know how?”

She gave him a surprised look. “Are you sure you’d trust me near your head with scissors, darling? Old habits die hard.”

”So do I, as you very well know.” He gave her a cheeky grin and she let out a snort. “And you love my cooking too much to get rid of me.”

”Don’t push it, Doctor, your hearts are right in front of me.”

”They’re _your_ hearts, River.” He gave her a besotted smile and she shook her head, a smile lighting up her face. Even when she was making jokes about killing him he found a way to turn it into a declaration. “All yours.”

”Mmm, dinner with my wonderful sap,” she tilted her head up at him, her fingers ghosting his lip. “If you’re trying to court me, darling, you’re too late I’m afraid. Him indoors gets ever so possessive.”

”Can’t blame him, look at you.” He dragged his eyes over her figure and she leans back a little, smiling suggestively. Suddenly reminded of how the students were looking at her, he said, carefully nonchalant, “Remind me to get you a wedding ring, honey.”

”I don’t need one. Honestly, what I have is enough.”

”No, it isn’t. Nothing is ever enough.” He insisted. “You deserve everything, River - always. But,” he looked away guiltily. “The ring is as much for me as it is for you.”

”What?”

”I heard your students talking about you. Critters.” He rolled his eyes. “They look at you and they immediately think - _you know_  - and even though you’re right in front of them, showing that you’re so much more than just your beauty, they don’t see it.”

”Are you saying that my students want to sleep with me?” She asked, a little amused and a little incredulous.

”Why is it such a surprise? Especially when you’re wearing _that_.” He gestured towards her outfit and she arched an eyebrow. “I mean, there’s nothing wrong with it, just a little, you know, heart-attack inducing for an old man like me.”

She laughed, watching with amused eyes as his eyes immediately get drawn to her cleavage.

”Still doesn’t explain why you want to get me a wedding ring, Doctor.” She said, placing a finger under his chin to tilt his head up. His eyes met hers.

”I forgot.”

”Forgot what?”

”Two years, having you all to myself.” He swallowed, licking his lips. “Forgot how it felt like to have other people look at you like that.”

”Doctor, no one can possibly look at me the way you do.”

”The way I do?”

She pulled him closer, the gap between them disappearing as she tugged on his shirt to bring his face down to hers.

”You look at me,” she paused, looking into his eyes carefully to find _that_ look, that exact look - and she knows immediately what to say next. “Like you have everything you’ve ever wanted.”

”Because that’s true,” he whispered, looking at her. “You know it’s true.”

He leant his forehead against hers, closing his eyes and opening a connection. She responded willingly, sighing contentedly as thoughts and declarations and the pure feeling of love flooded her mind from his. Two years of feeling this way, of feeling so unequivocally and undisputably _loved_ , and loving him just as much in return made her feel so lucky - and every day she was afraid she’d wake up and discover all this had been a dream. It made her want to cherish every single moment of their remaining time together because this - this is it. After the sun rises on Darillium, it’s the end for the both of them. 

“I love you,” she said out loud, her hands finding his neck and keeping him close to her while they still could. “So, so much, Doctor. Always.”

”River,” he muttered hoarsely, pulling her closer to the edge of her desk and parting her legs so he can stand in between them. Every part of her touched some part of him, her legs wrapping themselves around his. “How can I even explain how much I - ”

She cut him off, pressing her lips to his eagerly, deepening the kiss almost as soon as their lips touched. Their kiss was slow but desperate, as if they couldn’t get enough of each other. His fingers tangled in her hair, as her nails dug into the back of his neck, chests pressed against each other. 

“I love you.” He whispered when they parted for a moment, before kissing her eagerly again, pressing her back against the table carefully.

The food lay beside them, forgotten for now. 

**Author's Note:**

> AND THEN THEY SHAGGED LIKE RABBITS ON THE TABLE BECAUSE THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH.
> 
> Idk man. I just... don’t know at this point. I’m drowning. I love them so much but I cannot with the quality of this fic it sucks so bad it’s a horrible gift but I hope you like it Katie <3 Thank you for being the lifeblood of the river song discord server honestly what would we do without you.


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